I know better, and I must do better.

I’m so mad at myself. I thought I would take the day and celebrate the inauguration; my husband asked if I wanted anything from this donut place called ‘Winchells,’ I said yes. I got a large apple fritter and a croissant with bacon, egg, and cheese.

I checked my blood sugar in the middle of the day, and it was horrendous. I’m not even going to tell you what it was; that’s how embarrassing.

I was able to get it down by pounding water, so I did that. Then I made dinner, which was incredible. It was a roast with asparagus and peppers.

You all know that I know better than this. So, from now on, I’m posting here, and I’m focusing on doing better.

This haiku about carbs is perfect. I have a friend coming over tonight with a pasta dinner. I said yes to this because I figured I would just not eat most of the day and then try to not eat too much.

Too much food

I fasted most of the day yesterday and then ate this steak. My stomach started hurting and I just kept going. I eat like I’m never going to eat again. I need to think differently about food.

Lemon Pepper Wings
Lemon Pepper Wings

This weekend we had pizza and wings. We had a customer service snafu, so this pizza place offered us free pizza. I could not turn that down, could I?

10:56 AM

I told myself that I would have tea during the week and coffee on the weekends. Today was a coffee day and I did not restrict myself. I desperately need to hydrate though because all I’ve had today is coffee, and it’s almost noon.

2:18 PM

Our friend cancelled on the pasta dinner, but I still may make it for us, since we have the ingredients.


I made penne and tomato sauce, with a salad, and garlic bread. I was still hungry at the end of the night, so I made myself a mug cake with a very little of ice cream.


I finished my fast at exactly twenty hours.

That’s it! That was my day. I’m going to do my best to write more to you all.

It’s time for a new year, and while I’m excited about it I feel like we should all slowly, cautiously glide into this year. Let’s not say anything about it being the best year ever, let’s just let it be what it will be. Last year I was all like ‘New decade, new me.’ We saw what that did.

The last two food days have been nuts. Yesterday, we had crab, shrimp, cranberry and Brie bread, potatoes, and brownies. Today we were exhausted. I went to bed at 2 am this morning, so today was just a relaxed day. We may have had Wendy’s but no judging. I’m getting back on the wagon on Monday. I’m going to go back to intermittent fasting and being as keto as possible.

I hope you had a great new year! Expect a lot more check in’s this year!

There are fewer things in life right now that make me happier than this rack of pork from Costco. At Thanksgiving, my husband and I went on a search for them. We asked the butcher at Costco if he thought they were going to be available this year, and he said no. Last year was the first year I discovered it, sitting there on the selves of our beloved Costco. It looked seasoned like a pro, ready to just be put in the oven and enjoyed. It looked like a rack that you didn’t want to take the time to do on your own, so I was very excited to only have to put it in the oven. Then we got home, cooked it, sliced it and it was perfection.

Yesterday, my husband sent me a Facebook message. Yes, we were in the same room, how we communicate is none of your business. One of our friends, who lives in Temecula, which is about two hours from here, had the rack. We immediately sprung into action, we disregarded any human needs, like showers, coffee, etc., and got into the car. We decided we would try a different Costco than our normal one. This one is less crowded, and they had better chances of having it. We entered the store we started looking at all the shiny objects up front. There is very little that gets me more excited than seeing ’noise-canceling blue tooth headphones.’ We looked at Sony, Bose, etc. My dream one of these days is to afford those new AirPods Maxes.

Out of the corner of my I looked down into a strangers cart, don’t worry friends, I kept a safe distance, and she didn’t see me. I saw what looked like a rack in the correct container. “We have to run.” I said to my husband. We don’t run. We are not running people. We didn’t run, but we picked up our step a little. I looked in the case but I saw a beef roast, it was not the one I was looking for.

“Is this it?” He asked.

“Look at the price?” The price was approx. $150 for the roast. I motioned to keep looking. “We have to find the pork section.” I said. We kept looking. Then I saw it. A woman had her cart next to all of my racks. My Racks! I’ve been waiting months to get my hands on these racks. She left and I slid in as quick as I could. The reality of how many racks I wanted to get and the amount of money in my bank account, and room in or freezer did not match up. I wished I was back on my grandparents farm where they had a stand-alone freezer, I would have gotten one of those flatbed carts and bought all of the racks. Now that I’m thinking, maybe next year I need to start a GoFundMe for these. I picked out three racks of pork, two were for us and one was for my mother-in-law.

A few minutes later we were at Von’s, the grocery store. We went down the rice, aisle. I know, I know, I’m diabetic and shouldn’t be having rice. We stumbled upon the rice-a-roni! When I’m feeling down, sick, or just missing my mother I love to get broccoli rice au gratin. It’s delicious and inexpensive. Usually, they have deals where you can get five boxes for like five dollars. We searched, but they didn’t have exactly what I wanted. I went to my trust google and googled recipes for it. It turns out that it is not only rice but it has orzo pasta in it too. We bought the frozen cauliflower rice at Costco, so what if I used that instead of orzo. We did buy some elbow macaroni, so I could make mac and cheese for my husband for Christmas, and since we were in the pasta section I looked at the grams of carbs in orzo and it was something like 42 grams. I was already letting myself have rice, at least I could lessen the carbs by using cauliflower for some of it.

When we got home I messaged a friend who lives in the same building and asked her if she wanted to taste my rack……of pork. I told her to be over around 5:30 pm. I looked at my watch, it said this roast would take almost two hours, so I put the oven on three hundred and twenty-five degrees, put my Meater thermometer in and put it in the oven.

Costco Rack of Pork
Costco Rack of Pork

Then I chopped half an onion and sautéed that with three cloves of garlic in about a tablespoon of butter. Meanwhile, I cooked two cups of rice in a pot. I then added in one package frozen cauliflower rice in the onion and garlic mixture. I sautéed that for a bit and added finely chopped broccoli to the pan. Once the rice was done I added it, chicken broth, half and half and cream cheese and I stirred it all until it got to a thick consistency, then I dumped in some grated Tillamook sharp cheddar.

Broccoli rice au gratin
Broccoli rice au gratin

As soon as the roast came out of the oven I let it rest. The Meater thermometer tells you exactly how long the meat should rest to reach your desired temperature. While the meat was resting, I put the roast in a pan and put it in the oven, but turned the heat off. I just wanted to keep it warm.

Once the meat was done resting I sliced it and voilà, we had dinner! It was everything it was cracked up to be. I’m so glad we found it, now our next mission is to empty as much as we can out of the freezer, so we can go and buy more!

Pork loin and broccoli rice au gratin
Pork loin and broccoli rice au gratin

Clearly, by looking at the graph below, I let myself go a little bit last week. That average number is way too high and I need to do something about that this week.

Week ending 12/12
Week ending 12/12

Lunch today was leftovers from the last few days.

Chicken legs, pork and left over salad.
Chicken legs, pork and left over salad.

I downloaded Apple Fitness Plus, which was released today. I tried two of the workouts, a strength training one and more of a cardio one. I have a free month so I’m going to try it out.

I checked my sugar around 4 pm and it was 129. I was happy about that.

For dinner, I made steak with a cauliflower rice casserole and peppers. I cooked the steak and the peppers in the air fryer.

Steak with cauliflower casserole and peppers.
Steak with cauliflower casserole and peppers.

Today’s average was better than the previous days. I did have a small cup of ice cream with sugar-free Reese’s peanut butter cups. I know, I shouldn’t have but I did.

12/14 Blood Sugar
12/14 Blood Sugar

That’s it! Stay safe, until tomorrow.

I meant to write yesterday but zoom Christmas Parties, and hours of shopping got in the way. The night ended with more than a little bit of vodka and singing Broadway show tunes. I mean, every evening should end that way, right?

For dinner last night we had marinated chicken legs from Costco and broccoli that I added oil and ranch seasoning to.  

We found sugar free Reese’s peanut butter cups. I chopped them up and put them in a cup of ice cream. I thought if I used a coffee mug maybe I’d eat less ice cream than if I used a bowl.

At our happy hour last night a friend gave me the mug. No, we are not having a kid. It was a joke because of my dog.

When you go to Target do you ever just come home with what was on your list? We sure didn’t yesterday. We got a little tree, hats, and this egg cooker. It cooks eggs every way, omelets, poached, and hard-boiled eggs.

I poached eggs for myself but I cooked them too long. When I cooked my husband’s omelet it wasn’t long enough, so I thought I’d add more time. I was wrong. Oh, and we also found this keto bread at Costco. I really wanted toast with my eggs so we got it. It was okay.

As you can see in the picture below you can see that it was overdone.

Tonight I cooked pork loin and I made a salad with the leftover broccoli from last night, tomato, peppers, and an Italian dressing from Olive Garden.

My blood sugar was okay yesterday, as you can see below. Today’s numbers were high, because of the ice cream I bet.

12/12 Blood Sugar

Stay safe, more tomorrow!

Can you believe it’s the 11th of December?  I sure can’t!  I had a good day today, a quick day at work and then I worked on some writing.  And then!!!!!!  We watched ’The Prom’ on Netflix.  Man, do I miss the theater.  I was an emotional mess for some reason.  I think my husband thought something was wrong with me. 

I had two small tuna fish salad wraps, then some meat and cheese, and then for dinner we had Chinese food.  I didn’t want to cook because we were wanted to watch the movie and I had a happy hour after work.

My sugar was a little better today, as you see from below.
Tomorrow we have another happy hour, some shopping to do and that is it! 
Stay safe, until tomorrow.

How the eff do I go from 175 when I wake up to 190 at 11 am? I’m so fed up and done with diabetes. This sucks.

I was so fed up this morning with these numbers. I’ve been trying to eat better and drink lots of liquid and this happens. The funny thing is that an hour after the 190 reading it went down to 158. Then this afternoon it went to 129. So, I’m doing okay, but it’s just frustrating.

For lunch I heated up the left over pork roast from the other day. We had some canned green beans so I sautéed some onions and carrots with them. We need to shop for veggies but I’m trying to eat through everything while I can.

Pork with green beans.

Dinner was steak, the same green bean dish, and some grilled peppers. The steak was delicious but overcooked. I should have trusted my instinct and took it out sooner.


As promised, here are my numbers from yesterday, not great. I cannot wait for these numbers to go down.


Today’s sugar was about the same as yesterday, even though I had a good reading this afternoon.

Okay, that’s all I have to report today. We are watching Broadway, One Night Only, on TV. It’s making me sad and missing theater. I can’t wait for life to come back.

Stay safe, until tomorrow.

I often have dreams as soon as I fall asleep. I always go to bed before my husband; although I try to stay awake to say goodnight to him, I often don’t make it. I dreamt that someone was trying to get into our apartment while we were sitting there watching tv. I woke up shaking and disorientated. I think that started my night off to be a bad sleep. I woke up multiple times and was tired all day.

I’m, of course, telling you all this to set you up for the fact that I missed my walk today. I also ate some little cheesecake bites at lunch. It was a very strange need for sugar.

For lunch, I made some teriyaki wings with carrots on the side. I made them in the air fryer. They were frozen wings; I love how they come out. Yes, I know there is sugar in teriyaki sauce and carrots, ugh.

Teriyaki wings and carrots
Cheese cake bites.

I had real issues with deciding what to make for dinner. I’m working hard on not wasting anything because money is very tight, pandemic and all. So, I took some leftover chicken and made a taco chicken salad with lettuce, carrots, tomato, peppers, cheddar cheese, chicken, and thousand island dressing.

Chicken Taco Salad

I’m going to share today’s numbers tomorrow. I want to take my blood sugar right before bed today.

Stay safe! Until tomorrow!

Today was a much better day than yesterday. Except, I did not sleep as well last night as I would have liked to. I woke up with a bit of a backache, but that is not unusual. Oh, and I have occasional shooting pains in my sides. Damn, I’m so dramatic. I think I’m fine. The worst it would be is diverticulitis, but I don’t think it’s that.

For lunch we ordered from Mike’s Deli. It’s my favorite. I got the today’s special, it had roast beef, turkey, cheese, pickles, avocado, tomato, honey mustard and Mayo. It was perfect.

Mike’s Deli Sandwich

It took everything in me, I felt like I was attached to the couch, but I convinced myself to get up and go for a walk. I went on a little different route than yesterday, and it was great.

12/8 Walk

There was this pork loin at Costco last year that I loved! We cannot find it this year, at least not yet, but I wanted to try to recreate it. I don’t know that I did, but this pork roast that I made was delicious. I used a beef and pork seasoning that I bought plus a woodfired garlic seasoning. I put it in the air fryer at 300 degrees for about an hour or so.

Pork Roast

I served it with squash that I added a garlic parmesan seasoning and cornstarch. I hoped that it would turn out to fry them they would come out crispy. I should have cooked them at a higher temperature.

Pork roast, Applesauce and squash

This is where I’m embarrassed. I don’t want to show you yesterday’s numbers, but I am. This was the promise, right? I think it reflected the sugar I ate from the day before and the stress from yesterday. I’m also showing my numbers from today, so you can see that today was much better.

12/7 Reading
12/8 Reading

That’s it! Thanks for reading. Until tomorrow!

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